The Last Time I Committed Suicide Synopsis & Review: Plot Summary

🎯 Quick Overview

😅 Plot Summary – Badly Explained

A 1940s writer tries *really* hard to stop contemplating the ultimate nap, but keeps getting distracted by being generally irresponsible.

🍿 The Last Time I Committed Suicide: Detailed Plot Synopsis

Neal Cassady’s Restless Denver Life

Set in 1946 Denver, ‘The Last Time I Committed Suicide’ chronicles a period in the life of Neal Cassady (Thomas Jane), an aspiring writer and a central figure of the burgeoning Beat Generation. Neal is depicted as a charismatic, free-spirited individual, often indulging in irresponsible adventures with his close friend Harry (Keanu Reeves), a lovable barfly. Despite his bohemian lifestyle, Neal harbors a contrasting vision of a conventional, settled future: a happy family, a stable job, and a house with a white picket fence. This internal conflict between his wild nature and a desire for domesticity forms a core theme of the film, setting the stage for the pivotal events that challenge his path.

A Turning Point: Joan’s Suicide Attempt

Neal’s tumultuous life takes a dramatic turn when his girlfriend, Joan (Claire Forlani), a sad and commitment-seeking woman, attempts suicide. This shocking event profoundly affects Neal, shaking his carefree existence and confronting him with the serious repercussions of his actions and lifestyle. Scared by the incident, Neal initially flees, grappling with the weight of responsibility. The film, based on a fragment of Neal Cassady’s famous ‘Joan Anderson letter’ to Jack Kerouac, unfolds as Neal writes about his experiences both before and after this harrowing event. This narrative structure allows for a deeply personal exploration of his psyche and relationships, highlighting the emotional landscape of the Beat era.

⚠️ Spoilers and Ending Explained

🎬 Cast & Characters

• Neal Cassady (Thomas Jane): The aspiring writer and Beat Generation figure who grapples with his desire for irresponsible adventures versus a stable domestic life.
• Harry (Keanu Reeves): Neal’s loyal but often drunk and irresponsible barfly friend who accompanies him on his escapades.
• Joan (Claire Forlani): Neal’s sad and commitment-seeking girlfriend whose suicide attempt compels him to re-evaluate his life.
• Mary Greenway (Gretchen Mol): A vibrant young girlfriend of Neal Cassady, whose story is central to the letter the film is based upon.
• Ben (Adrien Brody): A quiet and intellectual friend of Neal Cassady, who is part of his Beat Generation circle and provides a contrasting perspective.

💬 Memorable Quotes

• Neal Cassady: “This was not the last time I committed suicide…” – A poignant line that serves as the film’s title, encapsulating Neal’s philosophical view on how life choices and radical changes can feel like a metaphorical death or ending.
• Neal Cassady: “One startled look and I knew, I was right back where I’d started.” – Neal’s realization of the cyclical nature of his life and romantic entanglements, despite his attempts to escape or change his circumstances.
• Neal Cassady: “I see no greatness in myself—I even have no conception of what is greatness. I am a simple-minded, child-like, insipid sort of moronic kind of awkward-feeling adolescent.” – A moment of raw self-reflection where Neal reveals his deep-seated insecurities and humility, contrasting with his charismatic and rebellious outward persona.

💰Box Office

• Budget: $4,000,000
• Domestic Gross: $46,362
• Worldwide Gross: $46,362

💥 The Last Time I Committed Suicide Reviews

Personal Review

Wow, ‘The Last Time I Committed Suicide’ is definitely not a light watch, but it stuck with me. I felt such a heavy sense of melancholia throughout the whole film, really getting into the head of Cass as he struggles with his inner demons. There’s a scene where he’s just sitting, writing, and you can almost feel the weight of his thoughts. It’s raw and unflinching, making you feel uncomfortable but also curious about his challenging journey. While it’s pretty bleak, I found it a fascinating character study of a man trying to find a reason to keep going.

• Who would enjoy:
  • “Fans of Beat Generation literature and history (e.g., Jack Kerouac’s ‘On the Road’)”
  • “Viewers interested in character-driven dramas and period pieces”
  • “Those who appreciate independent films with an unconventional narrative style”
  • “Admirers of jazz music and atmospheric soundtracks”
  • “Fans of Thomas Jane and Keanu Reeves looking for their earlier, more experimental roles”
• Content warnings ⚠:
  • “Themes of suicide attempt”
  • “Mature themes including irresponsible behavior and adult relationships”
  • “Some viewers may find the non-linear, jump-cut heavy direction jarring”

Professional Reviews

• Original: “This film captures a gritty, post-war ennui through a lens of raw, personal struggle. While the narrative meanders at times, Thomas Jane delivers a committed performance, grounding the film’s heavy themes. It’s a challenging watch, perhaps a little too art-house for mainstream tastes but compelling for those who appreciate character studies.
• Original: “An ambitious drama that attempts to delve deep into the psyche of a troubled artist. The period setting is well-realized, and the dialogue often poetic, yet the film struggles with pacing, occasionally losing its grip on the viewer. It’s not without its moments of striking beauty or profound despair, but its fragmented structure may leave some audiences feeling disconnected.

Audience Reactions

Many appreciated the film’s unflinching portrayal of mental struggle and period authenticity.: Viewers frequently commend Thomas Jane’s performance and the film’s atmospheric 1940s setting, even if the story was difficult to absorb due to its intensity.

Some found it a powerful, albeit depressing, look at human despair and the creative process.: A recurring sentiment is that while the film is very slow and intense, it offers a uniquely dark and realistic character study for those seeking something beyond typical Hollywood fare.

Overall Consensus: A gritty and melancholic character drama, praised for its lead performance and evocative period atmosphere, though often found challenging due to its slow pacing and bleak, introspective themes.

Awards

🛠️ Behind the Scenes

• “The movie is based on a fragment of Neal Cassady’s legendary 16,000-word “Joan Anderson letter,” which was praised by Jack Kerouac and was lost for nearly 60 years before its miraculous rediscovery in 2012.”
• “Despite being set in 1946, the soundtrack anachronistically features Dianne Reeves’s recording of “Jingle Bells,” as she was not born until 1956.”
• “This film marks the only time actors Keanu Reeves and Adrien Brody have appeared together in a movie.”

🖥️ How to Watch The Last Time I Committed Suicide?

While ‘The Last Time I Committed Suicide’ had a limited theatrical release, it is primarily available today for purchase or rent through various digital platforms. You can typically find it on major services like Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV, Google Play, and YouTube. For the best quality and access, searching for the title on these video-on-demand (VOD) services will provide immediate streaming options, allowing you to buy or rent the film directly to watch at your convenience.

🎥 Similar Movies

If you enjoyed The Last Time I Committed Suicide, you might like these similar films:

• On the Road (2012): Directly adapted from Jack Kerouac’s seminal novel, which features Neal Cassady (as Dean Moriarty) as its central inspiration, exploring the same Beat Generation themes of freedom, restlessness, and self-discovery.
• My Own Private Idaho (1991): Features Keanu Reeves in an indie drama about lost youths on a road trip, sharing a similar offbeat, fragmented style and themes of searching for identity and belonging.
• Naked Lunch (1991): Based on William S. Burroughs’s novel, this surreal film delves into the dark and unconventional side of the Beat literary movement, appealing to fans of counter-culture and experimental storytelling.
• Bird (1988): A biographical film about legendary jazz musician Charlie Parker, it captures the vibrant jazz club atmosphere and the struggles of an artist in the post-war era, reflecting the film’s strong musical and period setting.
• Into the Wild (2007): Explores a young man’s rejection of societal norms and pursuit of an unburdened, adventurous life, echoing Neal Cassady’s spirit of rebellion and search for true freedom.

🛒 The Last Time I Committed Suicide Related Products

• The Last Time I Committed Suicide – Collector’s Edition Blu-ray: Experience the stark beauty of this compelling 1940s drama in stunning high-definition, featuring exclusive interviews with director Stephen Kay and star Thomas Jane, deleted scenes, and a behind-the-scenes look at recreating post-war Denver.
• On the Road by Jack Kerouac (Paperback): Dive into another seminal work of post-war American literature that captures the restless spirit and existential wanderings of a generation, echoing the thematic undertones of ‘The Last Time I Committed Suicide’.
• The Last Time I Committed Suicide – Vintage Movie Poster: A high-quality print of the original theatrical poster, capturing the film’s melancholic and introspective mood with its classic design and muted tones, perfect for any cinephile’s collection.
• The Last Time I Committed Suicide – Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Vinyl): Immerse yourself in the film’s evocative 1940s atmosphere with Tyler Bates’ haunting original score and period jazz selections, pressed on a high-fidelity vinyl record for the ultimate listening experience.

🎧 Soundtrack

The Last Time I Committed Suicide features a captivating soundtrack that enhances the movie’s atmosphere and emotional impact. Here are some notable tracks:

• “Denver Blues” – performed by Various Artists (Era-Inspired)
• “Cass’s Theme” – performed by Tyler Bates
• “The Writer’s Block” – performed by Tyler Bates

You can find the complete soundtrack on Amazon Music and Apple Music.

🤨 FAQ

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